“I don’t know what to write, I just feel extremely exhausted, I want to speak, I want to cry …”

I don’t know what to write, I just feel extremely exhausted, I want to speak, I want to cry out loud. I’m tired of going to school because I always have to smile there. I’m very fragile, easily overwhelmed by emotions. I want to cry, but I don’t know why. I feel like there’s a chain of nightmares. I don’t want to make up for missed classes, I just want to leave right now to feel like I can breathe again. I feel like a mistake, it’s noisy and confusing, and there’s no one like those who kindly smile at me and stay by my side. I’m so tired. Writing feels exhausting. I don’t want to go to school anymore, I just want to stay home alone. I don’t want to study. I’m sincere, I don’t know why, but I feel overwhelmed, not calm. I’m so tired. Writing is too much. I’m mentally exhausted, I’m too tired and I feel helpless. I don’t understand why I feel so much like this when I go to school. I just want to suffer in silence in class. I’m so tired. Studying doesn’t seem to get me anything. I hate my own body, I hate the way I look and fake smiles, I hate everything about Hanoi, I just want to forget this current pain.